Saturday, December 24, 2005

I hate Christmas. There, I said it. They say it's a holiday based on love, care, and giving. I say bullshit. I say it's nothing more than an excuse for businesses to make money.

I'm sure I'd feel differently if I had kids. Remembering my own childhood, some of the best times of my life were in the month of December. Christmas vacation was often better than Summer vacation. Train sets and slot cars, ping pong and snowball fights, Mom's fudge.

The attempt to make Christmas a religious holiday failed miserably, except maybe during church services and in minister's households. We rarely heard about the baby Jesus. To us, Santa Claus ruled Christmas, and was the god of everything related. The North Pole was Heaven. Rudolf and Frosty were saints. The Grinch played the role of Satan.

Today, a group of individuals calling themselves "progressive" try to kill Christmas. Now, ordinarily I agree with most progressive proposals, but they're definitely on the wrong track here. While I agree with banning prayer from public schools and pasting the ten commandments everywhere, attacking Christmas goes too far. Would I be offended if a Jew wished me a Happy Hanukkah? No. In fact, I'd probably wish him a Happy Hanukkah right back. With a smile.

Even though I despise the commercialism Christmas has come to represent, not hearing "Merry Christmas" on television or in retail stores breaks my heart.

So, this holiday season, to those of you who advocate the death of Christmas, I say, "Go fuck yourselves." To the rest of you: Try not to get too depressed, enjoy spending time with family, and have a Merry Christmas.

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