I'm Not a Smart Man, but I Do Know What Love Is . . .
I rode my bike home today. I carried it upstairs to my empty apartment. Well, yea, I’ve got a couch, TV, and other stuff there, but after a week of almost constant laughter and affection, empty somehow seems an appropriate description.
All that prevents sadness from seeping in is the knowledge that this might be the beginning of an experience, the likes of which I’ve never known. And, while hearing your voice on the phone never fails to bring a smile, certain qualities, such as the smell of your skin, the way(s) you tilt your head while talking or listening, and your Yankee Forest Gump impression convey so much more than any word or group of words ever could. Your laughter is honest, and your heart I feel to be true.
Distance is never an ally in such matters; however, with frequent encounters as the one just finished, I feel we’ve reason to be optimistic.
posted by A @ 6:55 PM
5 comments
5 Comments:
I can identify with the feeling of emptiness ..... I recently got divorced and struggle with the silence and yes the emptiness too (even though i have an apartment full of furniture)
The silence, the memories (good and bad) seems to overwhelm me at times.
And then there is all the unanswered questions .... i know very well they will never be answered .... yet i continue to go in search of these so called answers
Does one ever know why things happen
Do we ever stop loving the people that hurt us the most?
Divorce is tough. I've been there twice. The memories fade with time. In my case, I eventually found that I knew the answers to those questions, but didn't want to acknowledge that, due to the pain it would, and eventually did, cause.
I find that with age, however, comes strength. And smarts. I no longer feel a slave to my emotions, and can choose where and to whom my love is focused.
Wasting such a precious resource on one who is undeserving borderlines insanity. From experience, however, I know that divorce can bring on that insanity. Best of luck to you.
YOu strike me as a very wise man ... insightful if i may say the least
YOu absolutely right, divorce brings out insanity ........ i am so insane right now that i do not even know who i am anymore
You probably don't know who you are because you identified so much with your spouse. At least that was the case with me. It'll take a little while to rediscover the person inside.
This is the time to keep your friends close. I find that reading uplifting material keeps the crazies at bay somewhat. Whatever you do, stay away from the news. The last thing you need right now is to hear about the fire that destroyed a family's life, or how many lives were lost today in a suicide bombing.
If you need a friend, feel free to email me.
Divorce is tough even if it is for the better I've found. Mine was inevitable and could have been avoided if on;y I'd never married the idiot. Hindsight is always 20/20 in my life. That's one thing that continues to be true. That and we are always where we are in this one moment for a reason and that reason often becomes obvious much later.
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